March  8th, 2010

oh, jim
too often
i fly down to
where the green grass
turns brown
where the sky becomes
ugly blood
and i mingle with
my black soul

and that’s why
i wrote what i did
about you
in that poem
comparing you to that
b-list actor.

i have no sense
half the time
and the other half
i’m just looking to make hate

but here
i am in this bar
listening to two assholes
talk about the actor like they
knew him
while i’m trying to read poems
by carl miller daniels
and get down this cheap beer.

he was a good guy
they said of the actor, jim,
but no one is really a good guy,
jim,
and they don’t even know who
you are
at least not the way some of us did

that downtown spirit
that heroin dirt
all the years you put in living
through the void

jim, we all miss you man.

can you ever forgive me?
oh, jim
this is the poem
that i was meant
to write.
                        

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© 2010 zygoteinmycoffee Ink.
Oh Jim--for Jim Carroll
by John Grochalski