| ZYGOTE IN MY COFFEE.COM |
| ***BIO*** Kenneth Barnes is trying to escape the horror show that is life in Fayetteville, North Carolina. In the meantime, and for reasons completely unknown to even himself, he writes. His poetry has appeared online at poetshaven.com, poetrysuperhighway.com and is slated to appear in the Spring/Summer 2006 web edition of alittlepoetry.com. Kenneth also contributes a weekly sarcastic rant he refers to as "his column" on thecheers.org. You can contact him at manofwords@hotmail.com |
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| © 2006 zygoteinmycoffee Ink. |
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| A Brief History of Lies |
| by Kenneth Barnes |
| This professor at the university in Wilmington
(North Carolina, not Delaware) held classes for nearly two decades without a high school degree. And no one knew. He claimed a Doctorate in History from somewhere that must have passed personnel; not one call was placed to check his(story). Within two semesters, students were racing to sit in the front row of his class. My sister made it in for a summer session and said people were sitting on the floors between aisles in an auditorium for 150. She said the classes were, like, holy sermons given by a minister wearing imitation Hawaiian shirts, who, like, preached the gospel according to Vietnam and said the sign of the beast could be found on Lyndon Johnson’s scrotum. And sent chills up the spine of the student body with stories of American boys 30 miles from Cambodia, holding rifles like Louisville Sluggers because days ago they’d run out of ammo but Charlie hadn't. Then the truth came out in ’98; somehow he’d gotten sloppy and bragged participation in a secret military coup in the ‘70s. A guy doing research for a book interviewed him and then did some digging. That’s all it took. Soon after he skipped town – the professor, not the writer. Say what you want, but bullshit like that is art. A masterpiece worthy of space at the MOMA, if not a brief viewing at the Louvre. Most people can’t lie their way through traffic tickets |
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| Aug. 2006 |
| 66 |