|When Catherine was a little girl, she killed her Father by beating him over the head with a doll. The doll was named Baby Love Crackers. Baby Love Crackers wore a heart shaped bib and came with a set of plastic crackers (for the doll) and real crackers (for the doll's owner.) When Catherine's Father had sampled one of these real crackers (without proper permission from their owner), Catherine had become so enraged that she bludgeoned him with the baby doll.
Of course Catherine had no way of knowing that Baby Love Crackers had a head and torso made not solely of shaped, non-toxic plastic, but also of metal rods. She did not know that Daddy's concussion would lead to his Wake, where her Stepmother would point at her ever so wickedly and denounce her as "the mini murderer." Though Catherine loathed her Stepmother, she did in fact blame herself, and Baby Love Crackers. Catherine could not be consoled, not even when Baby Love Crackers was recalled from stores and taken off the market as a direct result of this situation.
As a young woman, Catherine finally felt that she had a grip on the outcome of her life. She changed her name to Kelly. She stopped visiting her Father's grave, because it only brought her pain. Every night before she fell asleep she whispered the words, "I am a good person" into the air, and not "I am a wretched animal", as she had grown so accustomed to saying.
She met a young carpenter named Jerome Brady, and eventually became Mrs. Jerome Brady. It was the most glorious day of Kelly's life, even though she almost tripped over someone else's foot while walking herself
down the aisle.
On their wedding night, Jerome presented Kelly with a wooden doll in her likeness. The carpenter's handcrafted gift to his new bride. Kelly ran her fingers over the dolll's carved face; felt its little wooden smile.